Chimney Sweep

Everybody on the Web needs to this point MacKenzie Bezos

Luckless Lotharios are bombarding MacKenzie Bezos with online please-date-me missives after her split with husband Jeff became official Saturday, leaving her with $38 billion but no one to share it with.

“Now you are the hottest MILF I have ever imagined!!,” blurted Twitter cad Don Palovitz Saturday in the comments section of MacKenzie’s April tweet announcing her divorce.

He was not the only Don Juan hoping to woo the world’s 22nd richest person.

“Hey @mackenziebezos! Any plans for the weekend?” asked another ladies man, who identified himself only as MagnumPlo. “Give me a call and we can meet up someplace.”

“Good Morning Pretty Mama! Just Making Sure Your Still Feeling Very Loved Over There Baby!,” offered Robbie Lewis Smith Jr.

The outpouring followed a judge in Washington State signing off on the end of MacKenzie’s 26-year marriage to Jeff Bezos, who has earned an estimated $275 million per day this year.


The deal gives MacKenzie 19.7 million shares of — and a warehouse of same-day admirers.

“I’m raising money … To save my deceased mom’s house,” pleaded Twitter user Shaunie B, who helpfully included a link to her GoFundMe page. “Click to Donate.”

Another user, Xenohart, claimed to know “a great kid who deserves to go to college to make the world a better place” — if the divorcee happened to be searching for a new charitable cause — though warned that any financial support “may not be a tax write off.”

MacKenzie has plenty to donate, and seems keen to do so.

In May, the 49-year-old San Francisco native signed on with the Giving Pledge, an initiative of Bill and Melinda Gates and Warren Buffett that challenges the world’s richest individuals to give more than half their wealth to charity.

“I have a disproportionate amount of money to share,” she said in a letter that month. “My approach to philanthropy will continue to be thoughtful. It will take time and effort and care.”

MacKenzie, who married Jeff Bezos in 1993, had no prenuptial agreement with the billionaire and could potentially have been entitled to half his fortune, estimated by Bloomberg (after accounting for her payout) to still be more than $121 billion.

Instead, the former novelist surrendered any claim to Jeff’s marque properties, including Blue Origin and the Washington Post.

She also revealed Jeff would keep 75 percent of their Amazon stock and would retain voting control over her shares.

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