Shifting past labels & stigma throughout Psychological Well being Consciousness Month | Lafayette | Moraga
| Released April 26, 2023 |
| Going beyond labels and stigma during Mental Health Awareness Month |
| By Sharon K Sobotta |
Many Bay Area fans of the JV show on Wild 94.9 have been through a rollercoaster of emotions this spring. Many worried when JV (Jeffrey Vandergrift) began speaking out about his physical and mental health struggles while coping with Lymes disease last year. Concerns grew when Vandergrift described his challenges on the air on February 23 and disappeared the same day. On March 23, Vandergrift’s body was discovered near Pier 39 in San Francisco, confirming what many suspected but refused to believe – that Vandergrift was in fact dead. Reports confirmed no foul play was involved but did not name suicide as the cause of death. However, JV’s public discussion of his struggles with depression and his online account of his suicidal thoughts and a 2021 attempt that resulted in him being involuntarily placed in 5150 custody have sparked speculation that suicide could be the cause of death . Kelechi Ubozoh, co-editor of We’ve Been Too Patient: Voices from Radical Mental Health and survivor of attempted suicide, says talking is one of the best ways to deal with it. “When we see famous people dying by suicide, especially people who we think have everything, it can feel unsettling and shocking,” says Ubozoh. “People think that talking about suicide causes suicide, which is a myth and one of the reasons the subject remains taboo.” Ubozoh recalls her own struggles with mental health, which emerged after losing her grandmother at age 13 and resurfaced a decade later when she was assaulted. “When I was struggling the most, I looked great on the outside. People don’t ask people who are smiling what’s going on or check ones.” According to Kelechi, getting out of the technical details of a particular diagnosis frees up time to focus on the holistic care of the person concerned. “What if we took care of mental health as much as physical health and showed up with dinner or a casserole to remind the person in crisis that they are not alone? Ask open-ended questions (affirmation) that you won’t try to fix or judge anyone. (If you can, offer to) take something off (the person’s) plate.” Ubozoh put on a happy face and struggled through their difficulties. She attended journalism school and did her best to keep her smile until she was sexually abused at the age of 23. “I started feeling like I wanted to die and I sought help,” says Ubozoh. “The moment I said suicide, I was shut down. People think that if you’re having suicidal thoughts, you can just go to a therapist because maybe you’re too sick. A few days later (after unsuccessful attempts to get help), I tried (to take my life).” Today, as a woman in her thirties, Ubozoh is in a different place. She is aware that suicidal thoughts are not something that she is forever free of or that can be overcome. Rather, she has learned to deal with when or if those feelings arise. “(I gave up the slogan that it gets better and I went with it.) Something will happen again while we’re on Earth. (But I have to decide) How I’m going to deal with this I’m going to involve people. I will have a community. I will involve people who help me. I have healed how I respond to life.” A version of holistic care that Ubozoh describes is beginning to appear in schools across the state. The Lafayette School District is an example of a place that has evolved from a model of shared advisors traveling between campuses to one with one advisor at each school. Rachel DeChristofaro is a counselor at Lafayette Elementary School, where she says she supports both students and parents. On any given day, DeChristofaro may come into a classroom to demonstrate calming and stress reduction techniques with children, hold a support group for students who are having trouble maintaining friendships or coping with anxiety, and provide one-on-one support in the form of games, painting, and Tinkerers get a navigation plan for a successful day and do laps during the break. What does this have to do with education? A lot! The children DeChristofaro supports range in age from 4 to 12 years old and struggle with fears, worries and fears of not belonging or not feeling like they belong. “When a student is unable to regulate their emotions, express their feelings, or de-escalate (a tense situation) it can impact academics, teaching, and interactions with their peers,” she says. “The better we feel mentally, the more opportunities this can create for students to create a positive learning environment.” Something that Ubozoh, DeChristofaro, and possibly even Jeffrey Vandergrift, if he were still here, would probably agree is this: people of all ages and walks of life need support and a safe place to land. If you or someone you love needs to talk about a mental health crisis or are having suicidal thoughts, you can call 988 for support. |
